Friday, September 9, 2011

Have I let my kids down?

Sometimes a phrase catches my eye that makes me think all day. Today, I am already stuck on something...(and I wonder why my kids are perseverative?!)

The phrase..
"And I feel like I have let my kids down..."

This was the first thing I read this morning. It was just one line in a blog post but it made me laugh. This blogger is a Mom who is looked upon as a wonderful example of Christian parenting  and who still feels on some level that she let her kids down. It wasn't a big thing, just someting she hadn't introduced them to that she wished she had. If I could be like this mom for just a day, I would be well pleased.

I think the feeling of letting our kids down is universal.

Facebook and blogs don't always help:
I have a sweet friend who homeschools and all of her kids are memorizing the book of James during this school year.  Joy and love for the Lord exudes from this friend. Her posts on facebook remind me of what I wish I had done. Instantly, I feel like I have let my kids down.

I glanced at another blog of a mom this morning...the photos were gorgeous. The moments that most of us don't think to capture on film were all there...they were beautiful and idealic. Have a rushed through parenting and missed the moments like that with my kids? Maybe I have let my kids down..

I have not taught my children to responsibility in the way I should have...I often do too much for them. I have wasted time on things that were not eternally significant...I have worried about what others would think...

I don't make the healthiest meals. I haven't helped them memorize scripture enough. I don't homeschool. Have I let them down?

I wish we would have spent more time listening and praying and worshipping together. I have let them down.

Have I let my kids down? Of course I have. I get annoyed. I get frustrated. I get mad. I am such an imperfect example of Christ's love.

Well, now that I have given them all a reason to enter therapy in the future, I can step back and remind myself that we can not give our children all that they need.. We are human. We are not perfect and to expect otherwise would be a reflection on our own pride. I am a mess. I have said it before...it is still true. I am mess...

a forgiven mess...
a loved mess...
a precious mess...

And...all that really matters is that there is less of me and more of Him. What I have to offer is insignificant compared to what God has in store for them...what He wants to teach them. My imperfections are a reminder that I am in need of a Savior...that we all need a savior. And I have one desire...to have my attempt at parenting glow like a neon sign pointing to the One who will never let them down...

This whole parenting thing is not about me...not about how I have let them down...or built them up. And I am so thankful that I have something to offer them besides my flawed parenting skills...
I can point them to Jesus..and He will never let them down...




 “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.  You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 

Deuteronomy 6:4-9 ESV






4 Kind Words:

  1. Oh, Julie. THanks for writing this--I have been feeling all week like I am letting my kids down!

    But also, you are one of those moms whose blogs I read and just automatically think what an amazing mom you are. : ) You are clearly just the right mom for your kids, so I guess I am the right one for mine. ; )

    Thank you for the reality-check.

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  2. well, now I guess we've all done it... we've let our kids down.

    Thankfully, God won't.

    He'll make up for our deficiencies and help us to rise to a higher plane.... and He'll maybe remind us that it might not be the SEASON for fabulous photos, homeschooling, picture perfect hair-dos, perfectly matching outfits, amazing menus, and spit shined vehicles - in our life right now.

    It's someone else's season, but rarely do you find a person who has it all and does it all at once.

    blessings,

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  3. Wow, Julie - thanks! I really, really needed to read this today! Trying not to worry and be overwhelmed here today. : )

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  4. Julie...you are an amazing woman...don't believe the lies that the Devil will have you believe. God has called you to some very important people in your life...a group of amazing children. And amazing husband. You are doing an amazing job. A job that most of us would not be able to do as well as you do. You have a dedication that is not common and I look to you to know that I can manage one child from the foster care system. Plus...with God stirring my heart more....

    Disappointments are a part of life...and our kids need to experience them even from those that love them always and most...Until we are on the next side of this life...a life full of perfection...until then!

    Glad to know ya, glad to gain your wisdom...glad to call ya friend!

    Hang in there!
    Shan

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