What a ride it has been just since our last hospitalizations...By midweek last week, we had 5 kids home sick with coughs. By Wednesday evening, Isaac was admitted to the hospital with RSV. He is a sick little guy that's for sure. He just has little left to give when he gets sick...especially with something as awful as RSV. His lungs were not moving air and it was taking 4 liters of oxygen to keep his sats up. We debated about calling an ambulance but in the end we decided that I would take Elijah's nurse with me in the car to Mpls Children's. Once we arrived, they quickly determined he had RSV and we were admitted.
We are weary and it is showing. It was just three days in the hospital but it felt like a month. The three short hospitalizations we have had already in 2012 have taken a toll on all of us. Since transplant 6 months ago, we have been running full throttle making sure that all the needs of our children are taken care of. At times, I have wished for a pause button on our life so that we could take care of the overwhelming medical issues without all the rest of life running us over. But, despite our weariness, we have a sense of overwhelming thankfulness that our kids are ours...and that we have been blessed to belong to them.
We decided that we could provide the same care at home for Isaac as he was getting in the hospital and so he came home last evening. He is still very sick but we are grateful to have some nursing care at home as well as a new vest system that helps us to "shake" the junk out of his lungs so that he can clear them more effectively.
The other kids have been so understanding of the time I have spent away from them during the last six months, but it's all getting old and they need their parents home. I felt like I needed to get home because Elijah is also sick with a low grade fever..and RSV is very contagious. If Elijah has RSV, it could be very dangerous for him...and he very well could be in the beginning stages of it. I wanted to get home before I may have to leave again.
When it rains it pours...that is so true. We are in the midst of the storm. But God's provision and compassion has also poured out upon us. And each time I feel like we can not hang on much longer at this crazy pace that we are keeping right now, I am flooded with reminders that God is in control..that He knows every detail of what we are going through right now and he holds our fragile children in His hands...He holds each of us there...and I so need to envision his strong, tender hand holding my fragile self up right now.
We are weary, but not without hope. And in that hope, we will continue on...